Living E-book

Friday, July 5, 2013

Paranoia of Eating Healthy Part 4: Fears: The Breatharian Diet : Day 122

In Part 3, i looked at the first problem which is:
The definition of words that we use are based from different people's point of views

In this blog, we will look at the second problem, which is:
Resonant State of Stress and Tension based from Fear

About Stress

First, i will look at my mind - my fears and desires, when i was trying to 'not eat' and 'not drink'
(while trying the Breatharian diet).

In the blogs to come I will explore my mind as i try other diets.

Here are the fears that i had when i was trying to experiment 'not eating' and 'not drinking' (when i was trying the Breatharian diet) which i did not want to look at - focused on satisfying my desires then facing the consequence outflow of what i accepted and allowed.

My Fears and Desires while Trying the Breatharian Diet:

Note: this is the link to my blog, 'Decoding The Mind of a Breatharian' where i saw my fears::

Fear: Fear of competition - fear of losing
Desire: Desire to win

Fear: Fear of  being fat
Desire: desire to lose weight

Fear: Fear of telling others my process
Desire: Desire to compete - to tell others about my process

Fear: Fear of fasting 2x a week - fear of taking it too fast
Desire: Desire to fast once a week in the beginning - desire to take it easy

Fear: Fear of doing difficult tasks - fear of dying
Desire: Desire to do easy tasks

Fear: Fear of being tired
Desire: Desire to not be tired

Fear: Fear of not knowing what will happen
Desire: Desire to know what will happen

Fear: Fear that my body will not adjust and fear that it is adjusting to me not eating nor drinking
Desire: Desire to know why the body is adjusting to 'not eating' when all my life i was eating

Fear: Fear that i am running slow - fear that i am inferior
Desire: Desire to run fast - desire to transcend my limitation

Fear: Fear of sleeping like normal people, having 6 hrs of sleep - fear of being inferior
Desire to sleep shorter hours - desire to be superior to others

Fear of not having time to do things i want to do
Desire to have a lot of time to do things i want to do 

Fear: Fear of feeling heavy
Desire: Desire to feel light

Fear: Fear of old normal things happening
Desire: Desire to do new things

Fear: Fear of others being right and me wrong
Desire: Desire to prove others wrong - and me right

Fear: Fear of feeling bored - fear of being un-energized
Desire: Desire to feel alive and energized

Fear: Fear of not investigating things
Desire: Desire to investigate things

Fear: Fear that everything is not okay
Desire: Desire for everything to be okay

Fear: Fear that my shit does not look normal - fear of not knowing if that's healthy or not - fear of the unfamiliar 
Desire: Desire to know what's healthy or not - having a big feces or small feces

Fear: Fear of death - fear surviving on air only
Desire: Desire to survive on solid and liquid food

Fear: Fear of not being supported - fear of doing things alone
Desire to be supported - desire to do things with others

Fear: Fear that others do not know how to assist me to survive - fear of death
Desire for others to know others will be able to assist me to survive - desire to survive

Fear: Fear that others will not value what i do - fear to do that which others think is wrong to do
Desire for others to value what i do - desire to do that which others think is right to do

While i felt light and was experiencing a sense of 'awe' seeing new things happening,  which i interpreted as 'awakening', i did not realize that within me is a ticking time bomb which can explode in any moment like an explosive that contains a great amount of energy that can produce a reaction (of emotion or feeling) if triggered by an external stimuli - a word etc.

Emotions, Feelings and Psychology

I did not realize that within me, i am compounding these fears and desires like a positive and a negative current that emits an electric charge - similar to when i charge a word with a positive or a negative value.

Within this conflict and friction in my mind, i also saw friction and conflict in 'my without'  as this world system. I saw inequality, self-interest and competition.

We perceive ourselves separate from each other and so we compete with one another.

We develop a relationship of 'like or dislike' (emotions and feelings) to one another in our personal relationships, in group relationships and in the 'bigger picture which is the relationship between countries. 

This conflict and friction in 'our within', where we compound our fears,  is the same friction and conflict we see in 'our without' - as this world system, where countries declare War to one another, in the name of competition and the desire for 'power'.

We have to look at the fears that are fuelling our desires -  realizing that the consequence outflow of not looking at our fears/compounding our fears and satisfying our desires is physical/body stress and conflict as war in 'our without'.

This is not what is best for all of us. This will not benefit us, 'individually' either.

The question is, 'when will we take self-responsibility?'

We exist in this moment. 

We move ourselves in every moment, breath by breath.

I suggest for us to start by moving ourself within writing a blog as this will assist us to see how what we created in our 'within' we create in our 'without'.

No comments:

Post a Comment