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Thursday, November 15, 2012

Food Preparation and Time :Day 27 After Making 20 Meals: 'I Don't Care'


In this blog, i am doing self-forgiveness for moving fast and do more when there's little time and more to do and be lazy when i have more time and so little to do to release myself from this 'energetic relationship/experience of myself' within time to birth me here and assist myself to have a real relationship with time.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to drive myself to move fast and do more given so little time and so much to do - to make 20 raw food meals for a client and then the next day be lazy about doing another 6 raw food meals and 6 desserts for another client - cycling through the 'positive energetic experience of doing so much in so little time and then within a 'negative energetic experience' after that - with so much time and so little to do - which is me changing - as the mind driven by external factors within doing or not doing something - as who i have become as the mind in a 'negative energy experience' of me  when there's lots of time being available to me and so little to do believing there's no challenge to be the best within that - not realizing that who i am as life  - is not defined by energy - moving me within as presence

I commit myself to when and as i see myself doing something so fast when there's little time and so much to do-  and being lazy when there's so much time and so little to do - which is me having an energetic relationship' with time - rather than a real relationship with time - as i move me in every moment as breath - - i stop - i breathe

I realize that this is me defining me within an illusion of change as i superimpose my minds desire on reality - for a 'positive energy experience' within finishing 20 meals in a day which became a challenge  - a sort of competition between me and time - as i see time separate from me through the value i give it - where i give small amount of time more value -  more time - as less value. I also created an energetic relationship with tasks - seeing tasks as separate from me - where more things to do as more value- less things to do as less value - rather than having a real relationship with time, a real relationship with tasks/food preparation .

So, to assist myself to accept and allow me to establish a real relationship with time and with tasks/food preparation - moving me within every moment of breath - and accept and allow me to express me as who i am as equal to all that is here - as i prepare food - where i see food as fruits, vegetables, nuts etc. as equal to my expression - standing equal to the food within and as myself  - accepting and allowing myself to stand equal to all food items i prepare and the gadgets i use to prepare food  - as who i am as all life- breath by breath moment by moment.

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