The 'See Food' Diet Day 23 'I Don't Care' Character

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Self-forgiveness

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In this blog, i am looking at my 'desire' to eat 'tasty' food wherever i see one, in the kitchen, in restaurants, stores etc. - as the 'see food' character , not caring about the body, and through writing, self-forgiveness and commitment to correct myself moment by moment breath by breath in my living application, assist myself to establish a real relationship with the body , standing equal with the food, and assist myself to 'clear the communication lines' by releasing the 'thoughts, backchats, imaginations, reactions - both positive and negative, behaviors etc. and establish real communication with/as my body.

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Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to 

fear not existing, fear suffering, fear pain, fear death etc.

and so in my desire to survive 

as a 'happy' individual separate from all life

to cover-up my fears

to cover - up the doubt 

to cover - up the uncertainty

that i feel within that fear

eating whatever i see that i like

using the mind to manipulate the body to justify my desire

 to be 'happy'

and munch, munch, munch in 'happiness'

a 'positive energetic experience'

that i use to 

pretend

that i do not have any fear

and be self-dishonest to myself about who i have become 

as the 'see food' diet' character

believing i split myself into 2 

one part of me

fearing not existing, fearing suffering, fearing pain, fearing death etc.
desiring to cover up that fear
 by feeling 'happy'
through eating 'tasty food'

and one part of me 

is aware 
that who i am 
is physically here
not in a simulated reality/in the mind
that i am physically here
 as the breath in every moment

able to stop and direct myself

where the evil me

is only

interested about

what i want or desire

or interested about
 the 'happy' and 'content' feeling i have after i eat the food

the feeling of contentment and happiness

which i am addicted to 

where at the back of my mind 

i know i am not '100% me'

somehow knowing that i do not take full self-responsibility

to all parts of me as the whole - as all life

as i support the current system where nature, animals and plants 

gets mined and slaughtered for food and profit 

in a world of inequality

blaming the physical existence 

within spite

believing that the physical created 'tasty food'
not seeing and realizing that
i created the fear and the desire within my mind
so i am 100% responsible

 believing i have to

'go with the flow'

and be like everyone around me
existing in an unequal monetary system
fearing survival
 desiring to survive
so gets money to buy food to survive

desiring food to forget the evil
the poverty,suffering, pain etc.
that i created in my without
as the consequence outflow of
my  mind participation in 'my within' 

not caring about all parts of me
as all life

giving myself the excuse that 

it is 'too difficult'
to take self-responsibility for all parts of me as life

that i have to survive as the 
'i don't care' character

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to
justify my excuse
believing that i need to be whole
believing that i only have to get money
 to buy tasty healthy food to survive
to transcend my fear

believing that 'i have to survive and be 'happy'

not seeing and realizing that is balance in polarity

fearing a negative energy experience (difficulty,poverty, pain, suffering etc.)
and then desiring the 'positive energetic experience' (eating tasty healthy food)

believing 'it gives me life'

hiding behind the 'desire to be whole'

NOT realizing i am not defined by energy

 as 'positive and negative'

as for me to exist as energy 

i have to get it from a source

'unaware' that the mind is resourcing the body 

and transforming the nutrients i give it

 to mind energy

for it to exist

for me to exist

as the evil me

within self-interest

'unaware' of what that 'happy' feeling

  does to the body

as the 'happiness' character

'not caring' about the body

and how the mind resource energy from the body

transforming nutrients to energy

the evil me 'addicted' to

that 'positive energy experience' i get

when eating 'tasty' food

as the ' i do not care about the body' character 

where 'i do not care' to 

 bring the food within myself

where

'i do not'

stand equal to the food 

where i do not look at how the body responds to it after i eat it

instead of realizing
real wholeness does not need to separate from the source
and then unite to the source

real wholeness
is to give life meaning that is worthwhile for all

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Commitment to Correction

I commit myself to when and as i see myself  

fearing not existing, fearing suffering, fearing pain, fearing death etc.

and covering up that fear

through eating whatever food that i see and like

I STOP

I BREATHE

I realise that 

i am running away from my fears

and desring the 'positive energy experience'

'entertaining myself with food'

to be 'happy'

 instead of facing my fears

so, instead of running away

 and desiring 'tasty food' to make me 'happy' 

 doubting myself, spiting and blaming the physical existence

having excuses and justifications juts to be whole

as the evil me

within self-dishonesty, delusion and deceit

I face my fears

to through

writing

self-forgiveness

and commitment to correct myself breath by breath

moment by moment

in my living application

assist myself to

take self-responsibility for all parts of me as - all life

and wake myself up 

and see the consequential outflow 

of this in my  'without' as this current world system

to birth myself here as life

and to instead of 

eating everything i see that i like
immediately taking the food and eating it

and not caring about the body being resourced for energy

i clap once

i say, 'stop'

look at the food
breathing through the 'desire'

let it flow through me

to the earth

and stabilize me as breath

direct me

to bring the food within myself

standing equal with the food

realizing that my body

 is equal to the body of nature

is equal to the body of animals

is equal to the body of plants

as we are made of the same susbstance all are made of

looking at how the body responds to the food

to  instead of eating

without me being aware of me

and the real relationship

that exist between me and food
between me and all parts of life

eat in awareness of me
eat in awareness of the food as me

and the real physical relationship that exist

between me and/as all life

seeing the common sense

that my body

is equal to the body of nature

is equal to the body of animals

is equal to the body of plants etc.

and eat that which supports the body

assisting myself

to accept and allow myself

 to establish a real relationship with the body

to accept and allow myself to

establish a real communication with the body

to birth me here as all life

so life will be here forevermore

assisting in establishing and birthing

  a world that that truly honors life 

based on equality

stopping fear of survival